I'm What?
by ForTheLoveOfAnangel
Summary: Post Return of the king. Months after breaking up with Aragorn Legolas learns he is pregnant with his child. Caught between an angry father and an ignorant aragorn he doen't know what to do or where to go. Warning slash and Mpreg
1. Chapter1

Disclaimer: Seeing is how this is a FANFICTION site I think this would be rather obvious I own nothing so all you blood-sucking lawyers back off.

Summary: Set after Return of the king. Six months after breaking up with Aragorn Legolas finds himself pregnant with his child. Caught between an angry father and an ignorant Aragorn Legolas doesn't know where to go or what to do. AU Warning slash and Mpreg

Author's Notes: This is based on Aj Matthews Amin a Olin (hope I spelled it right) I Love all your stories (Especially this one. I hope you update it soon)

Legolas Greenleaf was feeling pretty pleased with himself. He had been officially broken up with Estel for five months now and was neither bitter nor sad. An amazing thing considering the circumstances of their breakup.

*Flashback*

__

Legolas is sitting on a bench in a Rivendale garden feeding the ducks in one of the ponds when Elrond and Gandalf strolled up to him nonchalantly. 

"So" Elrond said casually "I hear you're in a relationship with Estel"

Legolas just looked at him like he was insane. Everybody in Rivendale had known that for at least a month. He wondered if Elrond wasn't going senile in his extreme old age.

"Yes, I believe Estel and I told you that ourselves"

"Heh heh, so you did. I remember now. While we're on the subject Maybe you should break up with Estel"

Now the are you insane looks were accompanied by the what the hell are you talking about looks. "When exactly were we on that subject" asked Legolas coolly.

"What Elrond means" interrupted Gandalf "Is that since the quest of the ring you knew that Aragorn was destined to be king correct?"

Suspicious nod.

"Well then, you know that one of the duties of a king is to produce heirs"

Another nod.

"So you realize that Aragorn will need a partner who can give him these things, mainly not you"

"Aragorn's immortal he doesn't need heirs. He can rule forever"

"Legolas all kings need heirs to reinforce their claim to the throne. If something happens to them they need heirs to take over."

"Why are you telling me this and not Estel?"

"Aragorn has a tendency to be a little... close minded about things such as this. But I'm if you talk to him I'm sure you can change his mind"

Legolas thought for a moment then screwed up his face and reluctantly nodded.

"Great" breathed Elrond who went from anxious to relieved with one exhalation. "I'm sorry Legolas were Estel anyone else I would be the first to support your relationship"

"Its alright" said Legolas as he watched them walk back the way they came.

*End Flashback*

All that had happened six months ago. To say that he had been upset at being gangswayed by Elrond and Gandalf would be an understatement but he understood what they were saying. In the month that followed before he left Rivendale he managed to: Lose his virginity to Estel, break up with him while remaining friends and convince to start looking for a wife. He also managed to prove that he was completely capable of having a relationship without his family's constant supervision and not get heartbroken. Not that he would tell his family this as they would be more likely to start a hunting party after Estel than congratulating Legolas on his new independence. Now however he was going to the healers because despite the popular notion that elves didn't get sick Legolas was fairly sure he was coming down with something. A few weeks after his break up with Estel he had been getting sick in the mornings. That stopped a few months after it started but now Legolas was experiencing odd feelings in his stomach. It felt odd almost as if something was moving in there. Legolas was afraid he might have some odd stomach illness or perhaps he had been poisoned. That seemed unlikely though since his symptoms while irritating were hardly life threatening but it never hurt to be secure. He explained his problems to the healer and then stripped to his boxers and lay down on the examining bed. The healer began to examine him and it seemed to Legolas that he was growing increasingly afraid and he wondered what could be wrong with him. After making some last probes around his stomach the healer motioned for him to get up and get dressed.

"Tell me" said the healer "Have you been with a man recently?" 

Dozens of awful images filled his head ones where his father knew the truth and Estel was dead were the worst "Why?"

"It's just that your... pregnant."

__

Oh good he doesn't know...wait a minute "I'm what?"

"Pregnant, your pregnant" said the healer with a calmness that betrayed his facial expression.

__

Pregnant that would mean **Aragorn!**. _Oh gods my father!_

Neither the prince nor the healer knew much of panic attacks (they are very uncommon among elves) but if they had they would have recognized the symptoms right away. Legolas's pupils dilated and his breathing became shallow. He had just enough time to give the healer a worried glance before his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he fainted.

When he came to he was lying on a bed in the infirmary and his father and siblings were conferring with the healer. Legolas slowly almost subconsciously moved his hand over his stomach. It couldn't be true, it just couldn't he was male he couldn't be pregnant.

His father hadn't noticed him waking up mainly because he was trying to get some sense out of the healer who was sputtering and mumbling to him. 

"Speak up!" his father roared "come on man say what you will"

Had he not needed it all for himself legolas would have spared the man some sympathy.

Most unfortunately the healer chose that moment to regain the power of speech

"He's...he's" the healer managed to splutter out.

"Yes" said his father calmly

Legolas prayed to every deity he knew of for the power of invisibility but he had a feeling most gods were busy laughing at him right now

****

"Pregnant!"

"He's what?!" his father yelled.

__

Funny Legolas thought _that's what I said_

"Pregnant" said the healer slightly more confidant now that he had finally gotten the news out.

"I'm sorry" said Levon his oldest brother "But you must be mistaken Legolas could not be pregnant it's impossible"

"I know" said the healer "but he is"

That caused a deep rather disturbing silence that was finally broken by Adnilem his only sister. She was the only one who seemed willing to try and make light of the situation said "hey! At least dad won't be pressuring me for grandchildren as much"

Six sets of eyes focused on her (her siblings and her father) and she shut up at once.

His father looked at the healer the look in his eyes was that of a wolf about to leap. "Are you certain that Legolas is pregnant."

"Yes. He must have lain with a man and by some form of magic conceived"

"Wait a minute" interrupted Levon "Legolas would never lay with a man. Would you Legolas?"

__

Ah shit he must have noticed I was awake. Dammit I should have kept my eyes closed. Now be cool, calm just _think of something to say that will get them off your back_ "Um...I...That is I_" Dammit not it_

The combined stares from his brothers and sisters and the intense pressure of the look from his father was weighing him down so he just nodded dumbly.

The reaction was instant All eyes in the room except the healers and Adnilem's narrowed in anger.

"Who?" asked Levon his hand going to the hilt of his sword. Legolas he knew meant _Tell me who so I can_ _hunt them down and strangle them with their intestines.(To say that his father and his brothers were over protective of Legolas was kind of like saying the sun was hot or that Sauron is evil) _

"I'd rather not say" murmured Legolas softly.

"Why not, are you ashamed" asked his father equally softly but much more angrily.

Legolas became defensive and replied "No of course not it's just that we're not together anymore" He immediately knew it was the wrong thing to say. His father and brothers would have rather heard that he had had a one night stand rather than he was in a relationship with a man without their knowledge.

"Oh?" his father asked "And how long were you _together,_ exactly"

"'Bout seven months maybe"

"Ah and you had sex once"

"Twice" 

"And then you broke up"

"It was a bit more complicated than that"

"I'd rather not say"

"You'd rather not say a lot." Said his father.

"I..." Legolas began.

"That's enough" said his father "Legolas you sleep while we confer with the healer"

"Sleep Legolas I don't want you to leave this bed" said his father. Then he left the room with his children and the healer in tow leaving Legolas to stare at the ceiling with a hand on his stomach.


	2. Chapter2

Legolas had managed to memorize every crack, stain, design and swirl in the ceiling. However this being the infirmary the ceiling was fairly mundane and soon he had nothing left to look at. He was forced to think about his 'problem' that was currently growing in his stomach. Almost as though it had some sort of cosmic script the child chose that moment to kick Legolas in the ribs. It was that small movement that brought the full reality of the situation crashing down on Legolas.

_Gods he was pregnant! _

He was pregnant with Estel's child and he couldn't tell him because he had broken up with him not six months before (And because his family would probably try to shove a stick up Estel's @## and roast him over the fires of Mt. Doom). And no matter how much he tried to tell himself that he was over Estel it still hurt that he was forced to give him up because he couldn't have children. And now that he was with child he was alone, life is not fair.

His dark blue eyes widened as a very disturbing thought crossed his mind. _How exactly was he supposed to give birth to this child. _Sure people told him he looked girly with his long blonde hair fair complexion and slim body and he supposed it was true. But he was positive he was a man. He didn't have the 'equipment' that women had. After glancing to see that no one was in the room with him he slipped his hand down to check on his 'equipment'. He was thoroughly relived when he found he had no unexpected parts down there. And so that meant all that was left to figure out was how the heck this happened.

A few hours later Adnilem walked in and approached the bed carefully.

"Hey" she said softly, concern in her eyes "how are you?"

"Pregnant. You?" he said sarcastically not taking his eyes off the ceiling. Adnilem reached a hand to stroke his hair and he swatted it away.

"You know they're only like this because you're the youngest and you look like mom" she said.

"No I don't suppose I would know that." He snapped angrily.

True he was the youngest of their family but he had never known his mother. He was the odd looking one in his family. All his siblings looked exactly like his father so he supposed he had to look like his mother.

"No need to get mad at me. I'm only trying to help" Adnilem scolded him softly. "I was sent here t partially relieve your fears. The healer said you would be able to give birth normally though he still doesn't know what happened. And...." 

She hesitated as though she wasn't sure she should tell him

".....father has a spell that will reveal the child's sire after birth" she finished in a rush leaving her rather breathless.

"WHAT?!" Legolas screamed his eyes expanding to about five times their normal size. "Is there anyway to stop the spell from working?"

Adnilem got that look like she was having an inner moral dilemma but when she saw how distraught her little brother was she went against her better judgement and told him.

"The spell only works if it is preformed soon after the child's birth. The spell uses the bond the child has with its parents while in the womb but as the child grows older the bond dissolves"

"How old?" he asked through clenched teeth. This was not good.

"I'm not sure." She sighed. "A year ten months maybe" Her eyes narrowed when she saw the calculating look in Legolas's expression. 

"Please Legolas for the love of god do not do anything that would cause Father to summon Mirkwood's armies for the first time in twenty years." She said in a low voice very close to begging.

He looked at her his face the picture of angel innocence. "Adnilem would I ever do anything like that" he asked softly while sounding hurt in a little-boy-has-just-been-slapped-by-a-parent voice. 

Adnilem closed her eyes and tried to remember all the times he had used that exact same tone of voice while framing her for some small misdeed. When she opened her eyes however he had the most adorable set of puppy dog eyes she had ever seen. She felt her resolve crumbling around her like a poorly built sandcastle.

"Please" she begged "just promise me that you'll stay here and you won't do something crazy"

"Of course I promise Adnilem" he said in an I-pledge-to-be-a-boyscout-voice and flashed her a sincere white toothed smile. "Now could I get some sleep please I'm tired."

She sighed "Of course you can Legolas" and got up to leave and whispered goodnight on her way out. So relived was she that she failed to notice that the fingers of his left hand had been crossed the whole time.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: I thought I mentioned how this was different from the original Lotr story I know I wrote it down but I must not have uploaded it. This story takes place after the fellowship destroyed the ring. The main difference is that Aragorn and Arwen were never engaged. In this story Aragorn and Arwen are brother and sister. I have nothing against Arwen or her and Aragorn's relationship just in this story it's convenient so that's the way it is. Aragorn's relationship is with Legolas. And he breaks up with him a few weeks after his coronation. Also Aragorn has enough elf blood in him to be immortal. And lastly no one sails West at the end, not Frodo, not Elrond, no one.

Legolas waited until Adnilem had left the room than he got up from the bed grabbed his bag and flung it on his bed so that it opened. He began to run around the room like a headless chicken ripping things out of his drawers and throwing them onto his floor. He needed to leave before his father found some excuse to lock him in his room. He had a long trip and he needed to get a lot of supplies into a relatively small bag. He wasn't worried though, he had been in the fellowship of the ring packing was something that came rather easily to him. Once he had clothes, he got his bow and knives out of his closet (where else would you keep them?)  he grabbed a second bag and headed out the door. His first stop was the healing rooms. He began to gather several healing herbs that he would need for a long journey into the wilderness when he heard sounds through the closed door to the healer's room  cautiously he leaned up to the door and listened. He heard muffled voices and stilled so he could hear, it became apparent that his father was once again consulting with the healer. While he was evesdropping   he overheard a conversation that revealed some interesting facts about his pregnancy. Leaning in a close as he could to the wood he pressed his ear to the door and stilled his breath so he could hear what was being said.

"So exactly how long will this pregnancy of Legolas's last" said a voice that Legolas recognized as his father's.

"It's hard to say for sure" responded a higher voice that must have been the healers "There have been very few documented cases of male pregnancies, those that have been recorded ussually last the normal year. But like I said it's impossible to be sure." The healer sighed rather dramatically "He is about halfway to term but as I have no idea when the child was conceived I have no way of knowing when it's to be born. Also we have to take the sire's race into consideration........"

"What do you mean 'the race of the sire'" demanded his father "The sire is elven. Legolas would never lower himself to bed with one of the lesser races"

"With all due respect my lord" said the healer blandly "You said the same thing when you first heard that your son was pregnant. For that matter you said the same thing when you learned that your son had joined the fellowship of the ring"

Legolas couldn't make out what his father was muttering but heard phrases like... damn  dwarves, and .....damn Elrond floating throug the door.     

"Any way my lord" the healer said interupting Thranduil's rant "We should assume his Pregnancy to be a year in length but makes plans for if that is not the case."

Legolas heard another indistinguishable mumble and heard his father give a self resigned sigh. He copuld almost see his father straightening up and composing himself.

"Do you have any idea how this happened" he heard his father ask the healer although he sounded as though he already knew the answere.

"No" said the healer regretfully "It must have been through some form of magic though either a potion or a spell. But it would be impossible to tell when this happened or how or even if it was done deliberatley or not."

"What do you mean deliberatley?" his father yelled "How could it not have been deliberate"

Legolas quietly agreed with his father.

"Legolas could have inadvertently wandered into some sort of enchanted place and not even realised he had" replied the healer calmly "Such things have happened before you know. There are places that we do not know about that have magic older than the oldest of elves."       

 "I certainly hope it wasn't deliberate."  said Thranduil in such a tone as to suggest incredible pain and death for anyone who's fault it was. "You said that Legolas would most likely give birth in sixth months" asked his father. The healer didn't reply but Legolas could only assume that he nodded because his father just continued talking. "Well exactly how is he suposed to give birth, I mean are you going to have to cut him open or what?"

Legolas frowned and pressed closer to the door. This was something he had been wondering about to.

"Not at all" the healer said cheerfully "You see the main part of the magic is that now your son has a womb. He doesn't have the necesarry parts ro give birth however. But when it comes time to give birth those parts will grow. Probably a few days before he actually goes into labour.

"And after labour" his father asked somewhat timidly.

"After the labour is over his body will go back to normal" said the healer "He will of course still be fertile"

"You mean he will still be able to have children" said his father sounding quite upset.

"Yes" said the healer "But don't worry all those birth control potions will work on him"

"There will be no need for potions" sadi his father sounding somewhat murderous "Because there will be no encounters that would make this situation repeat itself."

"My Lord " said the healer "with all due respect, Legolas is well past his majority. Whatever he chooses to do in bed is no ones bussiness except his and whoever he's with. Besides what are you going to do, lock him in a chasity belt"

Legolas could tell by the thoughtful silence that his father was actually considering the idea he prepared to move away when a choice comment made him freeze.

"By the way my lord I forgot to tell you" said the healer "I believe that there are twins"

Twins Legolas considered this development as he stood up.

                         Being careful to be extremely quiet Legolas stepped away from the door and  crept down the hall to the stairs. His last stop in the palace was the kitchen where he began to put in his bag food and other provisions that he would need on a long journey. Most of this was Lembas because as cute as he was Legolas was not that good of a cook. You just do not get that many culinary skills living in a palace where are your meals are prepred for you. Or from being on patrol with soldiers who thought that cooking and building fires was below the work of a prince. They thought he should do something more fit for his station, like supervising. 

He also gathered honey fruits some dried meat and sweets. Lets face it no one should be out in the woods without candy, Legolas had already done that once in his life and that was one time to many. Satisfied that he had everything he needed Legolas made his way out to the stables. Saddling his horse so that she could carry all of his supplies and riding out in to the forest of Mirkwood posed no problem. 

He was also confident that he could ride without leaving a trail. The problem was that while he may have had the earlier reassurances that he could give birth normally, he suddenly noticed that he knew nothing about giving birth. He was however smart enough to realise that to give birth unaided on the forest floor was out of the question. He needed to find a place to go with people he knew who wouldn't rat him out to his father. 

Aragorn was out of the question because Legolas knew that when Aragorn found out he was pregnant he would immediately decide to marry him out of obligation. Legolas did not want a relationship like that. The hobbits were also disqualified because some how he did not relish the idea of Merry and Pippin finding out about his condition, also he had been to the shire before it was very hard to keep a secret there. If he didn't want every hobbit in all of middle earth to know of his condition he best not go there. This left only one option and luckily it was the last place his father would think to look. Taking a deep breath Legolas steered his steed and took off.

***********Somewhere in Caves Near Helms Deep*************

A young dwarf child and his dad awaken at the exact same moment. The young one looks at his dad and tugs on his small but impressive beard. "Dad I just got a feeling off imminent impending doom"

"I know son" said the dad "So did I"

"What do you think it means" the child asked snuggling against his father.

"I don't know son" the dad replied hugging his child close "But I'm scared"                                                                                        

Author's note: Sorry it took me so long to update. I could give you several reasons involving hockey, band and school but the truth of the matter is I'm lazy. I have a lot of ideas but when I try to write them down I get rather easily distracted the and characters are left to run amok in my head.  I'm sorry and will try to get the next chapter out sooner. One more thing who came up with the term plot bunny. It was explained to me a little while ago but I still can't shake the mental image of some poor girl desperately trying to write while being pounced upon by rabid pink bunnies. Then again maybe I'm just strange..... What am I saying? I KNOW I'm strange


	4. chapter four

I'm What? –Chapter four

AN: If your wondering about the slow update blame all the very talented authors out there. Every time I go on my computer to write I end up reading so, sorry.

****************************************************

Legolas swiftly rode bareback through the forest. Of course he knew that elves rode bareback but for some odd reason forgot (author looks guilty) and tried to make it to the caves in as little time as possible.

Meanwhile in the underground in the palace of Mirkwood a very different scene was being played out.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S GONE" Yelled Thranduil who's face had gone an alarming shade of purple.

"We mean he is no longer here Father" said Alleb the second oldest brother a lot more calmly than he was feeling. 

"But why?" asked Thranduil. "Do you think someone told him about the spell" he asked accusingly.

Adnilem tensed and tried her very best not to look guilty.

"I saw Legolas creeping around last night." Said Levon "He probably overheard someone talking about it."

Adnilem relaxed and said a silent prayer to the gods.

"We need to figure out where he went" said Alleb "So lets think where would he have gone."

They all got thoughtful for a minute trying to figure out where he would have gone then they all spoke up at once.

"Gondor"

"Lothlorien"

"Rivendell"

"Gondor, Rivendell?" said Thranduil indignantly "What do you think Legolas is like."

"Dad" said Levon slowly "You may not agree with who Legolas chooses as his friends but you have to acknowledge them in a situation like this."

Thranduil looked like he wanted to protest but instead just nodded his head.

"We need to send people to all of these places and see if Legolas shows up." Said Levon looking around for approval.

"All right" said Thanduil "But you will not tell anyone about why we are looking for him. In fact don't tell anyone that were looking for him. I don't want anybody knowing about this. Especially not Elrond or his brood" He then seemed to snap to attention and take control. "Levon you go to Gondor say that you are concerned about trade agreement or something. Alleb you go to Lothlorien you don't need a reason to go there and Adnilem you go to Rivendell. The half elf seems to like you so try and seem like you just wanted to come for a visit or something." They all nodded and turned to go.

None of them were really looking forward to their respective tasks but they all knew better than argue with their father right now. Adnilem especially was trying to figure out how she was to pull this off. People in Thranduil's family did not just go to Rivendell for visits.


End file.
